A job I did for an old friend
So an old friend of mine called me up,, “Wayne, I have a situation and I REALLY need some help.” She sounded distressed so I said I’d come by. That is what you do when somebody says situation with the right amount of pressure on it. You do not say can it wait until Tuesday. You put on shoes.
This was a while back. I am not writing it like I am trying to restart anything TODAY. I was looking through old Blogspot stuff and then I remembered the whole job, or most of it anyway. Memory is not a receipt. It is more like a junk drawer with a flashlight in it that may or may not work.
I got to her place and she met me at the door. VERY nice lady by the way. She said “thank you so much for coming, I’ve been so stressed about this.” I said “don’t worry, I handle these situations ALL the time.” That was true in the broad category of small household distress. Also she had the porch light on even though it was not dark yet, which I respected because a porch light should get a little practice before night comes in acting IMPORTANT.
She led me inside and I could see she wasn’t kidding about the problem. I said “ok, let me get my equipment ready.” She seemed relieved I was professional about it. I had my bag with the little light, the wrench, towels, driver bits, and the one screwdriver I call the BLUE one even though the handle is mostly black now because grease changed the paperwork.
I told her my normal rate was $75 for the first hour and $50 for any additional time,, but I can’t charge for this type of job. She said “that’s fair.” I said “I don’t do this for just anyone,, you know. I have STANDARDS.” I meant standards about who I help and what sort of problem I will crawl around for. A man should have standards or pretty soon he is fixing a ceiling fan for somebody who owns one screwdriver and calls every screw a nail.
I won’t go into all the details but I was on my back in a tight space for about two hours using my hands the whole time. VERY physical work. My knees were killing me afterward. There was a pipe situation and a bracket situation and one screw that had no intention of participating in society. I had to talk to it quietly. You do not yell at a stuck screw unless you are ready for it to win.
She kept asking if I needed water. I said I had water in the truck. She said “I meant right now” and I said no I am fine under here. Then she said “you sure are patient” and I said patience is cheaper than replacing the whole assembly. That is one of my better lines even though nobody writes those down.
At one point she asked if I needed both hands and I said I would prefer three but nobody sells that kit. She laughed, and then I hit my elbow on the cabinet wall and saw a small white flash that I think was either pain or a spiritual warning about particle board.
When I was finished she looked at me and said “wow,, I feel like a completely new woman.” I said “well you look like one too.” She laughed. I thought that was because the repair had improved morale in the room, which can happen with plumbing or a good sandwich.
I told her don’t hesitate if she ever needs me again. She said “oh, I’ll be calling you.” I said “I know where to find you.” That was because I had just driven there and knew the address. People sometimes make a simple location statement carry more luggage than it needs.
I still think about that job when my knees pop on the stairs. A knee will keep a record longer than a website does. That is why I am moving these old notes over here, partly. Blogspot was fine but it always felt like I was typing into a machine at a library that might ask for a quarter.
Comments are turned off for now. I had a form here once and I do not know where the messages went,, which is not a system.
Originally posted on the old Blogspot site.